Denny Tempest (1974 - Present) worked for a time at the Lord Darlingville Museum of Arctic Curiosities in Taunton, UK. His role was primarily as till clerk in the gift shop, selling 'Icy Explorer' lollies and penguin pencil sharpeners to groups of recently educated school children.
The museum's archives also housed the Fabrizio Endemic collection, the accumulated notes, equipment and letters of the famous explorer himself. Fascinated by the man, Denny Tempest would dress up in Endemic's old exploration gear and stride purposefully about the museum after closing, proclaiming himself to be 'Lord of the Arctic'. Endemic's goose-down tunic was unfortunately covered in the spores of the rare Arctic disease; Lumptatoes. Tempest unwittingly unleashed a plague upon the European population after a French school exchange group visited the museum. He still works at the Museum of Arctic Curiosities, but no longer has contact with the public.
T. Presper Mauchly (1943-1989) achieved notoriety for creating and producing the quiz show 'GET IT RIGHT' where members of the public were threatened with physical pain if they answered questions incorrectly.
During the shows three year run Mauchly would often provoke the contestants, by claiming that he knew the answers. He would repeat these claims over and over again, many of the contestants would choose physical pain over his unrelenting psychological barrage.
When interviewed about 'GET IT RIGHT' Mauchly would reply with only two words 'brown trapples'. Historian Dr Teddy Hamper believed this may have been a reference to Moses, whose catchphraise 'grey trapples' won the hearts of the Egyptians way back in 1638.
In November 1989 Mauchly paddled his dory boat into the pacific ocean, in a letter discovered three months later he claimed to be "searching for a dream".
Local mythology supposes that Mauchly was soon eaten by the giant octopus, Graham Johnson
Googie Müller (real name Lesley Müller) was a leading light in the "Polyester Folk" movement of the mid-1970s. His lunchtime TV show ("Play Today the Googie Way" - Tyne Tees Television 1974-76) was watched by audiences of up to 134 people on a daily basis. His love of man-made fabrics was ultimately his downfall when during a frenetic strumming section in "Froggie Went A-Courtin'" his signature polyester knitwear combusted. Within one verse he'd managed to destroy his rollneck sweater, beard, two thirds of the set and the rest of his career.
Gary Sebastopol Flinch was born twice, due to an administrational error, in Cleveleys in 1959. He first rose to prominence in the summer of '79 as a finalist in the short lived TV talent show "Show Us Exactly Why You Think You're Better Than Everyone Else" with his cat hypnosis act. Flinchmania grabbed the nation briefly between June and early August 1979 but came to an abrupt end when Flinch made some extremely disparaging remarks about TV host Choochie Playton's appearance on her live chat show "It's Choochie! Talk Me!".
Flinch went into hiding for 12 years only to reappear at the back end of the Baggy scene when he guested onstage with the New Fast Automatic Daffodils at the Cleveley's Mad For It Weekender. During their penultimate number (Missing Parts of Famous People) Flinch attempted to hypnotise 14 cats simultaneously. It was obvious to everyone in attendance that the old "Flinch magic" had definitely gone for good.
Ginchy Robinson Jnr (1958-1989?) was the son of Ginchy (a priest) and Barbara (a she-priest).
He made his great wealth when, at the age of 13, he produced the parlour game 'extreme snap'. It was an an instant hit and rocketed Ginchy Jnr to the hight of the parlour games circuit
Other games he created include:
Pony-poly,
Thuddley Tinks,
Cat Attack,
Forward-Backward,
Defend the Snakes,
Don't Use Your Shoes!
Pony-poly: An Australian Board Game,
Forward-Backward:3015
It has been noted that his attitude towards other game inventors was 'moderately obtuse'. There are also many claims of Puzzle-snatching, however there is a complete lack of evidence to any of the allegations.
In 1989 he disappeared, leaving only his Reigate Mansion which contained 3,054 dead shrews. It is feared that upon his return he will produce a game that utilises in, some part, dead animals.
Wine, women and song have been the downfall of many men but Hartley Frink (1910-1979) proved particularly susceptible to all three. Elected to parliament upon his return from World War 2, the former officer cut a blistering swathe through Westminster. Fierce in his opposition to Clement Atlee's government, on several occasions the Tory MP was moved to sit upon the modest Labour leader while consuming food from his trademark hamper. Frink almost derailed the foundation of the National Health Service in this manner, but, mindful of the important vote, Atlee greased himself before leaving home on the morning in question.
Through successive administrations, Frink proved a thorn in the side for colleague and political foe alike. For much of the sixties he insisted in bringing a working mangle to Prime Minister's Questions, for reasons that were never made clear. In the seventies he became increasingly truculent and took to lolling in the corridors of the Houses of Parliament playing wth the tin toy cars of his youth.
Hartley Frink gave up his seat on the eve of the 1979 general election. He drowned in a boggy marsh on election night. Rumours that Ted Heath had been seen in the area clutching a policeman's truncheon proved unfounded. An open verdict was recorded by the coroner.
Dan Berry
