Andrei Mendholm

Andrei Mendholm (1938 - 1976) would perpetuate 'mountain beast' myths all over the globe by dressing as a yeti or bigfoot and scaring mountaineers. He died in a sasquatch outfit in an avalanche on a mountain in Tibet.

Gary & Robin Rothko

Gary Rothko (1982 - Present) and his father, Robin Rothko (1955 - present) are a father and son scam team. Working primarily in the Greater Manchester area, they would use their trustworthy faces to gain the trust of their mark before enacting their elaborate and heartless schemes.

Tim Kencrom

Tim Kencrom (1967 - 2003) was responsible for orchestrating the rise in hospital mutinies in the mid to late '80s in which doctors and nurses were urged to take command of the hospital in the same way in which one may commandeer a vehicle.

Trent McMosley

Trent McMosley (1971 - Present day) studied at both Cambridge and Oxford universities. However this did not aid in calming his hatred of Sheep Dogs, in late June 2001 he used all his powers to vanquish the sheepdogs population of the North East of England, UK.

He now resides in Southernmost Southern Europe where he owns a small olive farm.

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The Footie Club

The Footie club (1982-5) was a grotesque gang of three, Toby Stanfield, Bertie Flecktube and Flaubert Trick. They wandered around outside Saturday football matches, launching items they had collected during the week into the grounds, using a crudely built trebuchet. Anything from Cola bottles, hedgehogs, small vehicles were cast over the walls of stadiums and small grounds around the UK.

Toby Stanfield

Toby Stanfield (1960 - 1999) The ring-leader andfounding member of the footie club was known for his hatred of any team to allow players to grow their hair long.

Bertie Flecktube

Bertie Flecktube (1964 - Present Day) was the youngster of the group and the only suviving member, he now runs a small butchers in stockport

Flaubert Trick


Flaubert Trick (1930-1985) had a twisted mind, believing passionatly that football should only be played by men over the age of 50. His actions on the 5th of september 1985 lead to not only his own death but also to the arrest of the remaining members.

Percy Cutworm

Percy Cutworm (1976 - Present day) is the current the holder of the world record for most aggressive telephone manner. He also has a dog, which he had kicked 3 times.

Schubert Crush

Schubert Crush (1930-1961) was a terrible man, he killed seven people, all named Steve Burns. He was finally caught in 1960 by a bus driver called Captain Thomas S Ravage.

Hank Stool

Hank Stool (1902-1959) was also known as 'the dreaded butcher of Buxton'. After quitting his job as a butcher he became a crime overlord, organising the now legendary 'Attack on the wealthy'. He was finally caught and executed in 1959 after accidentally handcuffing himself via a series of mysterious accidents. Now widely regarded as the most fearsome gangster ever witnessed in Buxton the families of the once wealthy victims regularly burn down his statue (located in Kent) replacing it with sawdust.

Glen Closer


Glen Closer (1955 - Present) turned bad after a series of relentless prank calls from teenagers who found the similarities between his name and that of a famous actress completely hilarious. Glen has since changed his first name to Gland and now works in the adult entertainment industry.

Warren Young




Warren Young (1955 - 2006) owned a small climbing equipment shop in North Wales in the late 1980's. The business folded due to Warren's unusually aggressive sales manner.

Philip Frederickson

Philip Frederickson (1960-1998) was a on the whole disliked man from Stoke, England. He once, now famously, tied a Labrador to a motorbike for 59 hours, claiming that nobody would want to steal both. His complete published works ilaborate on this theory culminating with his last book (published 1990-92) was titled 'the mutual exclusiveity of the coverting of motorvehicles and labrodors'.

Dirk Timpersontonly

Dirk Timpersontonly (1930-1961) was a private detective who hid in his later life hid babies from there mothers. Thankfully he was shot dead in 1961 after hiding the child of a woman who owned a gun.

Harry P Willmonger


Harry P Willmonger (1809-1909) was a collector of trinkets and dazzling shinies. On the day of the 14th of October 1865 he purposefully destroyed an old 'wiseman's collection of miniature looms. Some have attributed the argument that followed to the begining of the great war (1914 to 1918)

John Allingson


John Allingson (1982 - Present) contributed to the demise of the Woolworths chain of stores by frequently shoplifting penny sweets and small fancies as a child. As an adult, he pilfered DVD players and Nintendo DS games as well as the sweets.

Andre Kingston

It was in 1982 that Andre Kingston (1948 - Present Day) was first banned from Leicester. It was in a Leicester-based pizza restaurant that Andre tripped up a waitress. Needless to say, the situation escalated beyond reasonable expectations. This is the origin of the popular phrase 'By Andre's Teeth!' to express surprise or disgust.

Cedrik Butterchimp


Cedrik Butterchimp (1900-1962) was a small-time gangster from Milton Keynes, he made his name, and also his death, with his now infamous attack on London's Royal Albert Hall.

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